Okay, it’s been a while (over a year!) since my last Newsletter. Meanwhile, we're all in the midst of a pandemic, with little to entertain us except, well, reading (and Netflix). And in my case, writing. But I promised to send these Newsletters only when there was something to say, and nothing much of note has happened regarding my writing since the last one. Until recently.

Mrs. Kaplan and the Matzoh Ball of Death

When I last left you, I was anticipating the re-issue of MRS. KAPLAN AND THE MATZOH BALL OF DEATH, this time in both print and digital, as well as the second book in the series, A PAIN IN THE TUCHIS. That was before the sudden sale of my publisher, Black Opal Books. The new owners, to put it charitably, have had some problems getting their act together. MATZOH BALL was indeed finally published last May, but without anyone bothering to tell me, and with no opportunity to arrange for publicity, pre-publication reviews, etc. But at least it is now available. Here’s a link in case you’d like to purchase a copy: Note: At the time of this writing, Mrs. K was on sale (ebook) for $.99 on Amazon!

 

 

As for the second book in the series, technically it’s through its final edits and all that’s required is designing the cover and sending it to the printer. But as the previous book has demonstrated, that could take anywhere from a week to a year or more, so I’ve decided to put it aside for now and move on. And that brings me to: 

Murder with Strings Attached

Having had enough of Black Opal Books, I took my next book, MURDER WITH STRINGS ATTACHED, to The Wild Rose Press. These folks (all women, as it happens) are very professional and a welcome change from the current chaos at Black Opal. “Strings” is a caper/crime novel, a humorous story of a somewhat elaborate scheme to steal a priceless violin. Here is the short blurb: “A well-planned theft unexpectedly leads to murder and more when a lady burglar and a famous musician attempt to recover a priceless violin.” There’s some mild sex and an occasional swear word, so it’s not technically a cozy, but I think you’ll find it a fun read for a winter evening by the fire. It won’t be out until February 22^nd, but it can be pre-ordered now if you wish. Here’s the link: 

 

Other Books

Just to keep things up to date, SISTER-IN-LAW: VIOLATION, SEDUCTION, AND THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES is still available, still rated R (or maybe X, depending on your comfort level). None of that cozy stuff here. One reviewer said: "I was happily swept away by the characters and the plot and I read the book in one day because I had to know what happened. . . . [T]ruly one of the best books I’ve read this year. My verdict: a dazzling 5 Star read.”(No, I never met the lady. But I wish she'd review more of my books!) 

Also still available is MADE IN CHINA, perhaps even more relevant now than it was when I wrote it, with the current cool relations between us and China. 

 

 

And that’s about it for now. I have a new cozy mystery out looking for a publisher, and I hope to find one by early next year. Meanwhile, here are the jokes you’ve been waiting a couple of years for. Given the long time since my last Newsletter, I’m combining some new jokes with a reprise of a good oldie or two, on the assumption you’ve either missed them the first time, forgotten them by now, or don’t mind laughing at them again.  

Jokes 

Q: What’s the difference between publishers and terrorists? 
A: You can negotiate with terrorists.

Q: How many writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 
A: Six:  

• One to screw it in,  
• One to sharpen all the pencils in the house,  
• One to make more coffee,  
• One to call a friend to chat,  
• And one to complain that there’s never time to do any writing. 
• Wait, that’s only five — that’s why they need editors.  

-> Did you hear about the writer who jumped out the window on the 15^th floor? He could have gone to the 16^th, but that’s another story. 

-> You know you are a writer when the people you’d most like to invite to dinner are the characters from your book.

-> Irony is when someone writes: Your an idiot!  

Q: Why did the writer cross the road? 
A:She was supposed to be revising an essay, so she crossed the road to run some errands, and go for a quick walk, and maybe buy a new toaster.

-> A writer died and was given the option of going to heaven or hell. She decided to check out each place first. As the writer descended into the fiery pits, she saw row upon row of writers chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they were repeatedly whipped with thorny lashes.  
“Oh my,” said the writer. “Let me see heaven now.”  
A few moments later, as she ascended into heaven, she saw rows of writers, chained to their desks in a steaming sweatshop. As they worked, they, too, were whipped with thorny lashes. 
“Wait a minute,” said the writer. “This is just as bad as hell!” 
“Oh no, it’s not,” replied an unseen voice. “Here, your work gets published."  

That's all. Thanks for reading.